Home > Pregnancy > Resuming a Normal Sex Life After a Baby

Resuming a Normal Sex Life After a Baby

By: Jo Johnson - Updated: 14 Sep 2012 | comments*Discuss
 
Sex Sexual Intercourse Oral Sex Intimate

Although sex might not be your most immediate priority after having a baby, it is an important subject and there are a few guidelines that should be adhered to.

When can I have Sex Again?

It is recommended that women do not resume full sexual intercourse or receiving oral sex until at least six weeks after having a baby which should coincide with your post-natal check to make sure everything has healed and recovered as it should have. Please do not have sexual intercourse until this appointment has been attended and your doctor or midwife has told you it is safe to continue a normal sex life.

Will it Feel Different?

Your body has just been thorough a miraculous journey and has seen some very major changes occur, some of which may be permanent so feeling different both mentally and physically is to be expected.

Many women find that they are extremely sexually aroused shortly after giving birth and this is thought to be a response to the changing hormone levels in the body.

Equally as important is the number of women who feel a lot less interested in sex and this may also be due to hormones but is more likely to be because of their worries about their body, tiredness, a fear of not hearing the baby wake-up or because they are worried it may be damaging to their body of fearful of another pregnancy.

What are the Risks of having Sexual Intercourse Too Soon After the Birth?

There are several reasons why you shouldn’t have sex too soon after having a baby. To begin with you may feel pain as the tissues of the vagina and groin area are likely to feel tender or bruised as they have had a lot of work to do recently. Secondly, if you have torn or had stitches, there is a chance of getting an infection through a wound that has not healed properly.

There is also a risk if oral sex is performed on the woman as the pelvic organs may not have had time to return to normal. If air is accidentally pushed or blown through the vagina, it can enter the body or bloodstream which has the potential to cause fatalities so please do not be tempted.

What if I Just Don’t Feel Like it?

This is very common and often your partner will be less inclined to pursue the idea of sex if they see you are not at the same stage or they are very tired also.

Do not feel pressured to start having sex again just because you think you should or feel you owe it to yourself or your partner. Give your mind and your body time to adjust to your new circumstances and lifestyle and if this takes months then so be it.

You can still find ways of being intimate with each other without feeling like you must have sexual intercourse. A full body massage, spending a few hours talking gently or even relaxing listening to music can provide ample opportunities for quality time without feeling pressured into sex.

If your sex drive continues to be lower than before for a long time after the birth and you are worried about it, go and see your GP.

Contraception

If you do resume any sort of sexual activity after having a baby it is essential to make sure you have taken some very definite measures regarding contraception.

A woman’s body is more fertile in the year or so after having a baby than at any other time and the chances of falling pregnant are very high if no contraception is used.

As you have been pregnant for nine months and may not have had to think about contraception it is easy to understand why some couples forget about the issue.

Please speak to your midwife, health visitor, GP or practice nurse for advice on the types of contraception that are the most suitable for you after having a baby.

Sex after having a baby is often the last thing on a woman’s mind but it can be an issue for the male partner. Though you may not feel desirable or have much time for each other, it is important to communicate and understand each others point of view and find other ways of being intimate when you are able and enjoy being a family but a happy couple also.

You might also like...
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice..
Why not be the first to leave a comment for discussion, ask for advice or share your story...

If you'd like to ask a question one of our experts (workload permitting) or a helpful reader hopefully can help you... We also love comments and interesting stories

Title:
(never shown)
Firstname:
(never shown)
Surname:
(never shown)
Email:
(never shown)
Nickname:
(shown)
Comment:
Validate:
Enter word:
Topics
Latest Comments
  • wendy
    Re: Adult Bed Wetting
    Hi .. i never used to wet the bed ( only maybe onece or twice like any child) .. when I was 20 I had a big night out and woke up the next…
    21 May 2018
  • EmbarrassingIssues
    Re: Belly Button Discharge
    kavya - Your Question:Hi, My mother-in-law had an operation 2011 in her stomach. now yellow discharge is coming out from her belly button.…
    28 March 2018
  • kavya
    Re: Belly Button Discharge
    Hi, My mother-in-law had an operation 2011 in her stomach. now yellow discharge is coming out from her belly button. She is not feeling…
    26 March 2018
  • N/a
    Re: Bleeding During Intercourse
    I've got a new partner and I keep bleeding every time after we have sex.. it lasts for days. It's not my period. It's nothing like…
    24 March 2018
  • EmbarrassingIssues
    Re: What is Causing My Testicular Pain?
    ozzy - Your Question:I have testicale pain,, 1 doctor said it may be (varicoceles) & I should have a scan to see if there…
    20 March 2018
  • ozzy
    Re: What is Causing My Testicular Pain?
    I have testicale pain,, 1 doctor said it may be (varicoceles) & I should have a scan to see if there is anything else is…
    18 March 2018
  • Izzie
    Re: Adult Bed Wetting
    I have never stopped wetting the bed - until the age of about 15 I did it every single night without fail. Then I began to have some nights when…
    14 March 2018
  • Ihna
    Re: Bleeding During Intercourse
    Hi all i exPerienced that also bleeding during intercourse no pain and after that the bleeding stop,
    12 February 2018
  • Lauren
    Re: Inverted Nipples
    Hi I'm lauren and I'm 16, I have two inverted nipples and one of my boobs are slight bigger than the other and I'm a 36 b
    29 January 2018
  • EmbarrassingIssues
    Re: Asymmetric Breasts
    Poo - Your Question:I have asymmetrical boobs pls suggest and help meOur Response:The article ab
    10 January 2018
Further Reading...
Our Most Popular...
Add to my Yahoo!
Add to Google
Stumble this
Add to Twitter
Add To Facebook
RSS feed
You should seek independent professional advice before acting upon any information on the EmbarrassingIssues website. Please read our Disclaimer.