Home > Seeking Help > Telling Someone About an Embarrassing Issue

Telling Someone About an Embarrassing Issue

By: Beth Morrisey MLIS - Updated: 7 Oct 2016 | comments*Discuss
 
Embarrassing Issue Condition

Telling someone about an embarrassing issue requires privacy, kindness and respect. If you can't manage all three then wait until you can find a more appropriate time and place for such a discussion. Whether you are discussing an issue you've noticed about another person, or an issue you're experiencing and would like the other person to know about, it won't be easy to have this talk. Pat yourself on the back for this undertaking, but don't put it off for too long because allowing yourself or others to live with embarrassing issues rather than find help and support does no one any good.

Telling Someone About An Embarrassing Issue You've Noticed

Telling someone about an embarrassing issue you've noticed can be one of the most awkward social situations you can find yourself in. Often these issues have to do with someone's body, which makes the conversation that much more potentially painful. When you approach someone else about their embarrassing issue, be sure to frame the conversation out of love. Start by telling them that you have something serious to discuss and that you care about them too much to allow this situation to continue without talking about it. When it comes time to name the issue use more clinical, medical terms if possible. For example, instead of saying "You've got bad breath and I can't stand it", say "Halitosis happens to a lot of people, and I'm worried that you are living with a perfectly treatable condition". If possible, offer your assistance in tracking down a treatment or finding a diagnosis. Conversations in which you offer your love and support are much more tolerable to all involved than those in which one person essentially blames or shames another.

Deciding to Discuss Your Own Embarrassing Issue

As hard as it can be to discuss someone else's embarrassing issue, it can be harder to discuss embarrassing issues of your own. Very often people do not share their embarrassing issues because they are too ashamed to discuss their symptoms, and because they believe that they can soldier on with their secrets rather than burden others with them. Ask yourself, if a loved one had this condition would you be there to offer care and concern? If the answer is yes, then you owe this same care and concern to yourself!

Telling Someone About An Embarrassing Issue You're Experiencing

Let others know that you need to talk about your embarrassing issue because it has been affecting your life. Reassure them that you have sought help and treatment, but that there may be accommodations or extra flexibility you need because of your symptoms. If you need to ask them for specific help or understanding, now is the time. Don't be afraid to tell your loved ones that it was hard for you to share this information, and that you would appreciate if they would keep it to themselves as you will be telling others in your own time. You may not need to make such statements, but if you think you do then it's better to make them politely rather than wish you had.

Telling someone about an embarrassing issue is one of the hardest conversations you can have. Whether the embarrassing issue is theirs or yours, such conversations must be framed with care and concern. Work hard to keep these talks respectful and compassionate, and don't be afraid to explicitly state how you can help or what help you need. Those who truly care help others overcome or better live with embarrassing issues, and these conversations are a necessary first step.

You might also like...
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice..
lucie - Your Question:
Hi, I'm 17 and I'm very embarrassed of my inverted nipples (they are more shy). I've kept this secret in for years now and finally had the courage and told my close friends and mother, but it still makes me feel so self concious and I want to do something to change this but I'm scared to go to the doctors about it. I've tried the stretching method and that hasn't worked, am I too young for surgery or is there any other way to sort this issue out? Thanks!

Our Response:
Surgery might be a possibility but you would not be able to do that without a referral from your GP anyway. Make an appointment with your GP, ask for a female doctor, they'll have seen the problem before and will not make anything embarrassing for you at all. The GP will be able to give you advice on all the options available to you.
EmbarrassingIssues - 10-Oct-16 @ 10:52 AM
Hi, I'm 17 and I'm very embarrassed of my inverted nipples (they are more shy). I've kept this secret in for years now and finally had the courage and told my close friends and mother, but it still makes me feel so self concious and I want to do something to change this but I'm scared to go to the doctors about it. I've tried the stretching method and that hasn't worked, am I too young for surgery or is there any other way to sort this issue out? Thanks!
lucie - 7-Oct-16 @ 11:59 AM
Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice...
Title:
(never shown)
Firstname:
(never shown)
Surname:
(never shown)
Email:
(never shown)
Nickname:
(shown)
Comment:
Validate:
Enter word:
Topics
Latest Comments
  • Jojo
    Re: Verrucas
    I'm 13 in about 6 days I've had verrucas since I was 8-9, it's so embarrassing because I have to get changed in a group for PE I have one on the outside of…
    12 June 2019
  • Anto
    Re: Hairy Toes & Feet
    So funny how bigots of both signs say the opposite, that the shaved man aesthetics is influenced by gays, now some gay people say it's…
    26 May 2019
  • brinn
    Re: Inverted Nipples
    Hi im 13 and yesterday i realised i have inverted nipples but i had a surgery near my heart when i was four months old and i just want to not have…
    26 October 2018
  • Logan
    Re: Adult Bed Wetting
    i have been a bedwetter for so long now i am used to it and sleep in a single bed next to my wife
    29 September 2018
  • Kells
    Re: Adult Bed Wetting
    Hi im 52 the last 6 months ive started to.wet the bed. It can happen 2 or more times a week . I went to bed at 2am i woke up at 5am needing to…
    25 September 2018
  • Serena
    Re: Unsightly Warts on the Face and Neck
    Ihello I have face warts many years and Neck ,pls help
    20 September 2018
  • Storm
    Re: Adult Bed Wetting
    i was a bedwetter as a child until 15 due to molestation a few times growing up.. then went in hospital age 18 and wet the bed whilst staying…
    9 September 2018
  • EmbarrassingIssues
    Re: Inverted Nipples
    Blb - Your Question:Hi I’ve recently had my baby and ever since Then I have one inverted nipple not breastfed should I be concerned?
    14 August 2018
  • Blb
    Re: Inverted Nipples
    Hi I’ve recently had my baby and ever since Then I have one inverted nipple not breastfed should I be concerned?
    14 August 2018
  • Maddie
    Re: Adult Bed Wetting
    I am in my sixtys and have wet the bed off and on for the last 18 yrs it started when I started going through the menopause I suffered from…
    1 August 2018